All sane individuals realize this fundamental universal axiom: pineapple does not belong on pizza. Yet there live among us those who cannot come to terms with this reality. And at least one such individual is clearly situated in the upper echelons of Hood's upper management.

As soon as I read the word "pineapple", two things were immediately clear to me. First, the purchase decision was out of my hands at that point. I simply had to know. Second, I knew I was going to regret it. Indeed, both came to pass.

I'm sure there are people out there who would love this bastard. I, however, will never be among them.